My Ink Dance

Discovering Extraordinary Grace in an Ordinary Life

When Stillness Scares Me

Sometimes I need to force myself to be still. I need to force myself to quiet the raging ferris wheel of questions that spins round and round again. Sometimes the quiet scares me.

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I sat stringing ideas into words into sentiments today and the fear snuck up around my throat. The words I write, they are raw and imperfect. They show my heart when I’m brave and my thoughts when I’m not.

Even still, my own words can scare me. And I don’t know how to share them.

So, I click around distracting myself with headlines and glimpses at other people’s lives, hoping something will justify my bearing my soul here in this internet world of webs and wonder.

And maybe I’m not ready.

The thought worries me, but it’s no less real than the keys my fingers tap. And I don’t know quite what to do with that, with any of it really.

This writer’s world is new and exciting and worn and frightening.

But feelings are no reason not to do something.

So, I’ll continue to tap the keys and pour thoughts into words.

And I’ll force myself to be still. Sometimes the stillness is the only way to know how to move.


Linking words today with Holley Gerth and Jennifer Dukes Lee.

About Becky Hastings

I am emotional and logical. I am strong and dependent. I am a juxtaposition of head and heart exploring it all through writing. And in all my mixed-up ways I am loved. I'm here to tell you that you are, too. Just the way you are.

6 Replies

  1. I was nodding as I read this, Becky. Yup, it can be scary to just lay yourself bare on a page – to write the words that were once only whispers in your heart. God has showed me that when my motive is more of Him and my purpose is pointing others to Him, then there is little to fear. It doesn’t chase away the fear or doubt or uncertainty, but it brings a peace knowing that when He gives me the words, He will also point them in the direction they need to go. Here’s to being brave – with Him – for Him. So blessed to be your neighbor at #tellhisstory.

    1. Becky Hastings

      Thank you so much Tiffany! Your words encouraged me and brought hope today!

  2. Oh my goodness… I am so glad that we are neighbors over at Jennifer’s place today! I love this! This Call to write – and to do it out loud and live on the world wide web… it can cause your knees to shake and your heart to race, but when you let the words flow and feel His heart in it, there is just nothing better!

    And this: “…this internet world of webs and wonder.” Amen! (My OneWord is Wonder – so I am finding it show up in all sorts of places!)

    1. Becky Hastings

      Sometimes I forget that it is more than just a stirring inside…it is a call. Thank you for reminding me and for your kind words!

  3. Some days the hardest thing I do is hit the publish button. And being still enough for those words to flow…..there are no words for how difficult it is!

    1. Becky Hastings

      It is hard, isn’t it? I usually embrace the idea of challenging people with my words, but sometimes it feels so personal — not only to me, but to potential readers. I’m glad I’m not the only one!

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