My Ink Dance

Discovering Extraordinary Grace in an Ordinary Life

Why We Can’t Be Everything To Everyone

My husband offered to take the kids out and suggested I stay home and write. It sounds like a fantastic, generous plan. But somehow, I twisted it in my head and it became something else.

photo credit:

photo credit:

It became a finger pointing at me.

A finger that said, YOU…

are selfish.

are not enough.

are missing out.

Somewhere along the line I’ve adopted a notion that if only I can be everything to everyone, if only I can be at every game and every practice, if only I can help with homework and make cookies from scratch, if only I can do it all then I’ll be a good mom.

Little did I know I was setting myself up for failure. I had set a bar that was impossible to reach, but even worse I was attaching my worth as a mother to my actions.

I felt guilty taking time for me and little by little I was disappearing replaced by an image I projected of who I thought I should be for everyone else. Click To Tweet

But God…

He didn’t design us to lose ourselves in other people. He designed us to use ourselves to bless people.

He didn’t design us for a life filled with guilt. He designed us to live in freedom and grace.

He didn’t design us to be someone else. He designed us to be the most beautifully flawed version of ourselves.

Little by little I’m trying to find me. I’m letting go of guilt and finding who I am. It’s work. It’s awkward and messy sometimes, but it’s so worth it.

If you find yourself struggling with this idea of who you are in an often chaotic world, don’t miss my book, Worthy: Believe Who God Says You Are. Also, check out Breaking Busy by Alli Worthington. The last chapter, Worth: Finding Your Value in a World of Never Good Enough, is more underlined than not in my copy!




About Becky Hastings

I am emotional and logical. I am strong and dependent. I am a juxtaposition of head and heart exploring it all through writing. And in all my mixed-up ways I am loved. I'm here to tell you that you are, too. Just the way you are.

2 Replies

  1. honest and trthowurtsy when dealing with others of the first principle. Friends, no matter where you are inexperienced or experienced things change, marshes, you believe in good faith, to maintain the integrity, commitment to integrity. You can hold a contract of mind, to win their human dignity, will eventually accomplish something great cause.

  2. That’s a brilliant answer to an interesting question

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