My Ink Dance

Discovering Extraordinary Grace in an Ordinary Life

3 Easy Ways To Love Someone When It Feels Hard

It’s easy to love people when life is all rainbows and unicorns and relationships are flowers and x’s and o’s. But what about when real life hits? What about when you have disagreements or arguments or even fights? Is it even possible to love someone when they’ve hurt you and the chasm feels too wide to cross?

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The best place to start may sound a little cliché, but it only becomes cliché if you don’t mean it. And I firmly believe this is the best, if not the only place to start.

Ask God for help. He never asks us to do it all on our own. He only asks us to be willing. Start with Him. He won’t lead us in the wrong direction.

Do something nice, even if it feels forced. This is where we become the hands and feet, and oftentimes it seems the most daunting. Make a choice to do something. Start with a smile. Maybe it means choosing to be quiet instead of feed the arguments. Maybe it means making the person’s favorite dinner or cookie for no reason. Choose something and follow through.

Forgive. So often the root of our struggle with a person is twisted up with unresolved issues. Make a choice to forgive, even if you don’t feel it yet. If you don’t know where to start check out my post 490.

When we make love about choosing the other person that chasm between you gets smaller and you just might find your way back from hard to whole.


About Becky Hastings

I am emotional and logical. I am strong and dependent. I am a juxtaposition of head and heart exploring it all through writing. And in all my mixed-up ways I am loved. I'm here to tell you that you are, too. Just the way you are.

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