My Ink Dance

Discovering Extraordinary Grace in an Ordinary Life

Fear Of Flying

I was one of the lucky ones. I grew up being told to fly. Told to reach for the stars because I could be anything I wanted to be. The sky was limit.

But there was one thing no one warned me about.

 

image credit: wonderous-world.com

image credit: wonderous-world.com

 

No one told me that there would be a glass ceiling I’d hit, and it had nothing to do with being a woman. It had everything to do with me.

It was a ceiling I’d build. Brick by brick I would put it in place. Limiting myself, my potential, my dreams. Holding back my faith and leaving me just beneath the surface so I could still see all that was possible, but know it’s not for me.

Some may call it reality. That real life lens of growing up that put each piece of glass in place. But really it’s fear and doubt. Insecurity and uncertainty. I have given each of those a place in my life that holds me back from possibility.

Because there is a God who loves me like a child despite my years. A God who sees me on the edge of something great and is telling me to fly. Instead of looking at Him, I look at this ceiling I’ve created and tell Him I can’t do it.

But still He stays there calling out to His child to jump. He beckons that the sky is beautiful and I really will fly. I doubt Him because of the things I’ve put in place. When He tells me to look up I realize that they are not bricks at all but windows. He’s opened them, but I have to jump between all the fear and doubt if I want to fly.


Sometimes words come smooth and flow freely. That wasn’t my reality today. It came as a picture and I tried so hard to put words to the image. It felt more like stops and starts, but this is how I fly.

Check out the other posts in my series 31 Days to Finding Your Way Home.

Linking up with other women who fly today!

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About Becky Hastings

I am emotional and logical. I am strong and dependent. I am a juxtaposition of head and heart exploring it all through writing. And in all my mixed-up ways I am loved. I'm here to tell you that you are, too. Just the way you are.

4 Replies

  1. Hi Becky,
    I’m your neighbor at Holley’s link-up today and I’m so glad to meet you! I love how you describe God wooing us, beckoning us to jump into all he has for us, despite our fears and what holds us back. I’ll be pondering this good truth all day . . . 🙂

    1. Becky Hastings

      Thanks Valerie! I’m so glad you stopped by 🙂

  2. Jump, friend! Fly! Thanks for linking up at #ThreeWordWednesday.

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