My Ink Dance

Discovering Extraordinary Grace in an Ordinary Life

When You Feel Invisible

I walked into the little market and immediately saw three people I knew. They were perfectly pleasant people, always friendly in the past. Busy with their work and conversations, I headed over to the soup comfortably minding my own business. I wasn’t sure how to go forward.

It’s that moment when I wonder if I should say hello. Do I go out of my way to initiate conversation with these acquaintances or do I stay invisible, head down, busy in my own self?

Because deep down I seem to think that although I may see them, surely they don’t see me.

I walk past two of the people talking and I have a choice. I can avoid eye contact or choose to be the person I would want someone to be to me. I look over, pause and say hello. It’s uncomfortable and uncertain for me, but both return a friendly hello and I keep going.

It was a start.

12196143_10208627923242464_7872870723023619333_n

Over at the counter I say hello to other person and then head to a seat. As he brings over my hot chocolate, I take a risk and start a conversation. I ask about him and the business. Joke casually and smile. It was perfectly normal, even if it didn’t feel normal inside.

As I left I wondered why I feel invisible. This idea that no one knows who I am, that I’m not memorable enough that someone would know me, says little about them and everything about me.

pablo (3)

But I don’t want to be that version of myself, the one who waits to see if someone knows me before I reach out.

Knowing I’m worth seeing is the beginning of being seen.

 

 

About Becky Hastings

I am emotional and logical. I am strong and dependent. I am a juxtaposition of head and heart exploring it all through writing. And in all my mixed-up ways I am loved. I’m here to tell you that you are, too. Just the way you are.

2 Replies

  1. Becky, this is a thoughtful post. I have lived in the same small community almost all my life, and often I see people who I know but they avoid eye contact or conversation. It hurts to feel invisible. However, I keep trying to simply say “Hello” and take the high road, because I want to treat others the way I want to be treated.

    1. Becky Hastings

      Yes! Keep on keeping on friend!

Leave a Reply