My Ink Dance

Discovering Extraordinary Grace in an Ordinary Life

Are We Playing Church?

There are two versions of me. I walk up to those big double doors on a Sunday morning and suddenly, I change.

I push down all those things that I’ve carried all week hiding them under a bright smile and purposeful walk. I act as if I know where I’m going and what I’m doing. How I wish that were true.

I stand and sing perfect faith and hallelujah, all the while hoping no one can see those things I’ve carried all week, those real things, those things of my truest self. I sing praise and nod my amens for my allotted time. Then I walk out and put my Sunday best away like a nice pair of shoes.

We hide our unbelief and bring our spit shined selves to the pew, all the while thinking that’s what God wants. Click To Tweet

We can sing and praise and it is beautiful and tidy. We leave our mess at the door pretending we weren’t screaming at our kids only 20 minutes earlier. We hide our unbelief and bring our spit shined selves to the pew, all the while thinking that’s what God wants.

God never asked for our masks or our problem free versions of who we think we should be.

We drop it at the door thinking that’s what everyone wants, so it must be what God wants. We think this is what He expects. But the only thing it does is save face.

We play church like kids playing dress-up, and we do it so well. But what if we were never meant to drop our stuff at those big double doors? What if we were meant to bring it in unashamed and praise uncertain? What if we came and sang, “God I want to believe” instead of kidding ourselves? What if we came honest and real and approached the throne?

Maybe then we would see that our praise was never expected to be perfect, it was only meant to be genuine. And in that genuine place, when we are honest, we can merge those two versions of ourselves until we are left with one.

One person honestly, imperfectly seeking a God that never asked for anything more than who we truly are.

This post was originally published at Altarwork, a beautiful collective of christian writers, musicians, and artists. Don’t miss this amazing space celebrating creativity and faith!

It's easy to get wrapped up in a game of pretend when it comes to Sunday mornings. Have you been pretending? Playing the role you think everyone wants you to play? Putting on a happy face?

Sharing words at #raralinkup and with these great writers today!

TuesdayTalkButton_edited      dreamtogether-linkup            

Holley-Gerth-Button-250x250 (2)    tellhisstory-badge    susan mead    GraceTruth-300x300   

About Becky Hastings

I am emotional and logical. I am strong and dependent. I am a juxtaposition of head and heart exploring it all through writing. And in all my mixed-up ways I am loved. I'm here to tell you that you are, too. Just the way you are.

16 Replies

  1. Thank you for sharing Becky! I so agree, our praise is to be genuine. My favorite moment is singing praises to glorify and honor God. When I am genuinely singing (mostly out of tune) the Spirit moves in me, and I am once again humbled by His great love!

    1. Becky Hastings

      Those moments are beautiful!

  2. Oh, friend! I just love this post. So real and authentic. God doesn’t want or need us to mask our messes. Beautiful! XO

    1. Becky Hastings

      Thanks friend! xo

  3. Becky, I love that the term “Sunday Best” is becoming less common and “authentic Christianity” is becoming more the norm. We’re wasting our time when we’re not real, wasting God’s time, our time and other’s time too. Thanks for this honest post. Praying God blesses your mess and brings a message out of it for you to share hope with others.
    ~Sherry Stahl

    1. Becky Hastings

      I’m so grateful for the ways God uses our messes to bring hope!

  4. God never meant for church to be a place where we hide. 🙁 How sad he must feel when masks go up there. Thanks for being authentic, Becky.

    1. Becky Hastings

      You are so right Lisa!

  5. I loved this! My goal (although I fall short of it every day!) is to be authentic and genuine before God. I do not want to be a “clanging symbol” in His ears but rather an imperfect follower of His. #Dancing With Jesus

    1. Becky Hastings


  6. I enjoyed this post-Becky!
    Love this part where you wrote;
    “We hide our unbelief and bring our spit shined selves to the pew, all the while thinking that’s what God wants.”

    1. Becky Hastings

      Thanks Cori!

  7. This post is such an important read. God looks at our hearts and wants us to bring them to Him, struggles and all–instead of hiding. It reminds me of all the way back to the Garden, when Adam and Eve, upon eating from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, knew their nakedness and hid in shame from the Lord. But our loving Father, who sees all of us, still desires to take us into His arms, comforting us and refining us–rather than shaming us for our weakness and struggle.

    Thank you again for this post. I pray that God uses it to set many free from the mask and the hiding that we are often prone to, so that the Father can touch the deepest places of need and longing in their hearts like never before!

    1. Becky Hastings

      Thank you for your encouragement Amanda! God is always there no matter what we carry.

  8. Its sad we so often feel this way. The church is meant to be a family – loving and caring for one another – not hiding who we really are but building one another up toward Christ. Thank you for your thoughts!

    1. Becky Hastings

      The church is a beautiful thing. Imagine how beautiful it cold be if we all built one another up toward Christ!

Leave a Reply