My Ink Dance

Discovering Extraordinary Grace in an Ordinary Life

Apologies, Excuses and Legends

My whole life I’ve wanted this one thing. It’s not something that I’ve told people, but those closest to me probably suspect it. It makes me feel vulnerable and needy, but that only reaffirms my desire.


You can’t buy it.

You can’t earn it.

You can’t make it up.

My whole life I’ve wanted what John Legend makes so smoothly sensual, but my longing has nothing to do with romance.

“All of me loves all of you. Love your curves and all your edges. Love your perfect imperfections.”

I’ve searched for this complete love for so long I missed it right in front of me. I always knew that “Yes, Jesus loves me” but I still don’t understand it. How can the God of all the universe love me?

I tried to justify it. I tried to wrap my head around it all by grasping forgiveness and redemption. I got to a place where I could understand that maybe, just maybe He loved that me; the forgiven, redeemed, someday version of me.

But the me sitting here right now?

It doesn’t make sense.

Gracefully, my God is not a God that operates in logic. He delights in doing what we least expect.

Right here, in this moment with no apologies for who I am, no excuses for what I do, I am loved, you are loved.



About Becky Hastings

I am emotional and logical. I am strong and dependent. I am a juxtaposition of head and heart exploring it all through writing. And in all my mixed-up ways I am loved. I'm here to tell you that you are, too. Just the way you are.

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